Dear Pretty Princess,
Thanks a lot for nothing! Because of you, a simple rhyming board book, my two-year-old twins now know what a princess is. Because of you, they put on dresses and spin around, saying “ta-da.” Because of you, there are a row of frilly dress-up dresses and tutus hanging to dry in my laundry room. Because of you, all things must be “pretty” to be worthy.
Don’t try to say it isn’t your fault. Before my son found you in the Little Library up the street from us, there were no princess in our house and therefore no “princess” in my girls’ vocabulary. He thought he was doing something nice for his little sisters by picking out a book for them along with some books for himself. I tried to intercept you before the twins saw you, but it was too late. Before I knew it, I was reading, “One pretty princess puts on her crown. To go to the ball, she must pick out a gown..” over and over and over again.
At the very least, couldn’t you be a more modern princess? I mean, blonde hair and blue eyes aren’t at all representative of my bi-racial family. And picking the pink gown is soooo predictable. At least the girls agree with me that the both the green and yellow gowns in your closet are much “prettier” than the pink one you chose. Maybe there is hope for them, after all.
The bottom line is this: don’t get too comfortable. As soon as I think I can get rid of you without causing massive meltdowns, it will be back to the Little Library for you. Actually, now that I think about it, I don’t want to cause the same grief for another unsuspecting mother. I will have to find another place for you to go where you can’t taint the minds of young impressionable girls. Hopefully this is just a phase that will pass by soon.
An Anti-Princess Mama