I know it was bad timing, but I couldn’t help myself. I flung open the bathroom door as my husband was helping my son brush his teeth before bed, broken baby-doll stroller in hand.
“I told you to be gentle,” I said, using my firm, I’m-not-playing-around voice. “Now your sister’s stroller is broken. You are not allowed to play with it anymore.”
My son does not like to be told he was wrong and he really does not like to be “yelled” at. The fact that I did both immediately set him off. Had I taken a moment to think things through, I’d have known it would be better to have this conversation in the morning after we’d both had a good night sleep. Instead, I got him all worked up right before bed–smart move, Mom.
“Oh yeah? Well, you’re the worst mom ever! You know what I’m gonna do? I’m gonna…”. My five-year-old let me know exactly what he was going to do, using every “bad” word he has learned from kindergarten this year: stupid, hate, and everything in between.
“Stop,” I said. “We don’t talk like that. I’m just letting you know not to touch the stroller any more.”
My son takes after me in that he always wants the last word. He dropped his toothbrush and stepped back from the sink, about to continue his tirade when the back of his legs bumped into the toilet bowl and he fell in with a splash. Into the water he had just peed in. And hadn’t flushed yet!
His eyes grew round as saucers as he realized what just happened. The look on his face was priceless. My mind momentarily considered my next moves, but I didn’t have to think about it for long. The sight of him sitting in the toilet was hilarious. I couldn’t help but laugh. “Well, I think you got just what you deserved,” I giggled, breaking the struggle the had ensued just moments before.
My son seemed relieved that I wasn’t mad about the toilet incident and started to laugh, too. I took his hand and helped him out of the toilet, grabbing towels off the towel rack for him to stand, dripping, on. As I peeled off his wet clothes, discarding them in the bathtub, we replayed with words and laughed about what had just happened. After a quick rinse in the shower, he pulled on clean pajamas, finished brushing his teeth, and was ready for bed.
“I’m serious, though, no more rough-play with your sister’s stroller,” I said as I gave him a goodnight hug.
“Okay, Mommy,” he replied, hugging me back. “Best Mommy ever!”
One point for Mom! But I think the toilet deserves to be named MVP.