I don’t know how to say this politely, so I’m just going to say it: you have officially overstayed your welcome here!
When you arrived at midnight EIGHT days ago, I was a little annoyed at the inconvenience, but not totally surprised. After all, you haven’t stopped by at all this season, and I knew you would be coming eventually. You didn’t seem put off by the fact that we don’t have any extra beds to offer (there is literally no room at this inn). No, instead you decided you would just make the rounds, starting with the oldest and working your way down to the youngest. How kind of you for not leaving anyone out.
If you must know the truth, what is really getting to me is your sneaky ways. Quite honestly, the unpredictable nature of your stay is making it hard for me to be a good host. On more than one occasion, you seem to have completely left for 12-24 hours, only to return obnoxiously in the middle of the night. If you had just let me get a little more sleep, I might not be at the end of my rope now.
I’ve picked up on your pattern, though, and if my calculation is correct, we have one more day of your company to tolerate. Enjoy your final hours as our guest, because I don’t want to see you again for a long, long time.
A Tired Momma